Prince Harry officially stepped down as a member of the royal family in 2020, but his struggles with the role began long before then. The prince has opened up about his unique life in his book ‘Spare’. Although many people assume he’d led a perfect life, Harry speaks about difficulties and the identity crisis, he had faced behind the scenes.
Prince Harry’s identity
In his book, Prince Harry reveals the story behind his nickname Spike. He had earned it during a gap year in Australia in 2003 when he worked as a ‘jackaroo’ at Tooloombilla Station. One of his friends had shaved his head beforehand, and at that point, it was growing straight up in ‘spikes’. He said he even changed his accent to better fit the name.
“Soon enough my mates at home got wind of this new nickname, and adopted it,” he said. “I became Spike, when I wasn’t Haz, or Baz, or Prince Jackaroo, or Harold, or Darling Boy, or Scrawny, a nickname given me by some palace staff. Identity had always been problematic, but with a half dozen formal names and a full dozen nicknames it was turning into a hall of mirrors.”
Although so many names could become confusing, he welcomed each one. “Most days I didn’t care what people called me. Most days I thought: Don’t care who I am, so long as it’s someone new, someone other than Prince Harry.”
Growing up with “distance”
Prince Harry said he was denied affection from his family as a child. He was taught to keep a distance from other people. “As a royal, you were always taught to maintain a buffer zone between you and the rest of creation. Even working a crowd you always kept a discreet distance between yourself and them,” he explained.
He had titled his book after his “position” in the royal family, with his older brother Prince William being “the heir,” and Prince Harry being “the spare”. He claimed William received preferential treatment because of their birth order. But Harry sees a perk of being “the spare” since “I have more freedom than he does, right? So his life is planned out for him. I have more flexibility to be able to choose the life that I wanted.”
Hopes for reconciliation
Despite the fallout of his emancipation and follow-up interviews, Prince Harry hopes for a reconciliation with his brother and father, King Charles III. “If we can get to the point of reconciliation, that will have a ripple effect across the world,” Harry said in an interview about his memoir. “I genuinely believe that, and that’s kind of what is pushing me. And if that doesn’t happen, then that’s very sad.”
Although his book delves into the negative aspects of his upbringing, Harry decided to publish it since he didn’t think it would worsen his relationships with his family. “I have thought about it long and hard,” he said. “And as far as I see it, the divide couldn’t be greater before this book.” He has written about William in his book, describing him as his “beloved brother and arch-nemesis” in summary of their complicated relationship.
“Codependency” with the tabloids
Harry has always been open about his disdain for the tabloids. He even has accused royals of purposely spreading negative press about Meghan. Aside from reconciliation, Prince Harry hopes to change what he calls “the codependency” between tabloids and the royal family.
“There are some people, especially in the U.K., who have been led to believe that because you are a member of the royal family, somehow everyone owns you or has a stake in you,” he said. “And that’s a message that has been purely pushed out by the British tabloids, and it creates real problems within that family and that relationship. Of course, there has to be some sort of relationship, but where it’s got to now is incredibly unhealthy.”
The next generation of royals
Today, Harry and his wife Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex, live in California with their two children. They have removed themselves from the duties of royal life and now pursue independent careers. Although Harry supports the continuation of the monarchy, he expresses concerns about the future generations of royals. He hopes to create the change.
“I also worry about other young kids within that [royal] family if this continues,” he said. “Because who’s to say that someone else doesn’t fill my shoes and that their partner, whether it’s a husband or a wife or boyfriend or a girlfriend, doesn’t get treated exactly the same as Meghan did?”
